another side of the story

Just read:

http://shakespearessister.blogspot.com/2009/03/breaking-silence-on-living-pro-lifers.html

It's My Turn to Pick a Movie!!

Most people who know us know that we do not have cable. Haven't had it since July 1997 and have no intention of getting it any time soon. When our tv is on, it is usually tuned to either PBS or a movie. (Well, there was the one night when I walked into the room to see Desperate Housewives on the flat screen and J sitting on the couch. Oops.)

So, while it is great to be able to say that we don't watch a lot of tv, the reality is that we do watch a lot of movies. Yeah, the same ones all the time because the kids pick, and kids can somehow watch the same freakin' thing a million times in a row without their ears and eyes bleeding profusely. They are so resilient. I, on the other hand, have developed and polished my ability to tune things out. I just might be able to match inattentiveness with any man out there! (ha!)

What I have noticed, unfortunately, is that E, who used to be able to sit and watch maybe 10 minutes of a movie before needing to move on to more exciting activities, now can become absorbed into the action. The child will put a chair in the middle of the family room, sit down, and watch a movie. As all moms know, this cuts both ways: Hallelujah! My child is being quiet and entertained without me! Oh crap! My child's brain is turning to mush with the electronic babysitter!

It is fun to watch him act out scenes later or to hear him talk about how much he likes the girl in the movie. Oh, we love Carmen in Spy kids! And sparkly pencils make great wands. Petrificus Totalis! Yes, E goes around and tries to petrify all of us in the house.

The one consolation is knowing that as the weather warms up that this won't really be an issue as the kids will be outside playing much more. So, instead, I will be thinking: Hallelujah! My kids are outside getting exercise and having fun! Oh crap! My kids are outside getting dirty, scraping knees, and staining their clothes! A ring around the bathtub every night!

But, at least then maybe I will get to watch a movie.
:)

picture tag

So, I'm over at the McGregor Journey catching up on their New York life -- I love living vicariously -- when I get to the "Picture Tag" post. I am totally getting the "my-blog-is-suffering-because-of-Facebook" addiction, and I love the pic that Jo puts up for her tag: very cool. I keep scrolling down and found out that she tagged me! Why that little . . . :)

Apparently, you are supposed to go to your 4th picture folder and pick out the 4th picture and post it. You then tag 4 people. Hey, simple! I like that. (The ones where you are supposed to tag 25 of your closest friends -- wth??)

So, while my 4th pic in my 4th folder isn't as cool as Ash's mom's pic, I do think it is pretty darn adorable:



This is E home for 3.5 weeks. So, he would have been about 17 months at that time -- now he's 2.5! Oh my. Love my baby boy.

So, who shall I tag? How about:

Kevin and Stacie
Jill's Expedition
Mamushky's World Headquarters
Raising the Divine Miss M

Goin' to Guat -- Day 3

Day 3 was picture day. Since we spent Day 2 shopping, I decided we needed to load up the camera with images. Above are just a few from that day. As someone who has never been good with cameras and picture-taking or managing to get everything back home, I was very happy to come home with what we did. (Classic picture history: Lost our camera coming home from our honeymoon in Hawaii. Yeah, that's right. No pics of our honeymoon. The other time was our trip to Nassau. Something bad happened to our memory card and wiped out all the pics on it. Fortunately, J had taken some on our old film camera. To say I was a bit paranoid about our digital memories surviving this trip is an understatement.)

J was not so thrilled with walking around all day, and he gave a big sigh and groan whenever I stopped to snap a pic. He survived, though.

The highlight of the day was finding the restaurant Cafe Sky. A casual place with rooftop dining, they served breakfast all day! We went for lunch and marveled at the view while eating our eggs and pancakes. Loved it so much we decided to go back for dinner that evening. Unfortunately, it was a little more crowded, and we ended up near a trio with potty mouths. Now tell me, does every effin' sentence have to be littered with effin' curse words?? Ugh! Anyway, this was one time when I really struggled with my Spanish with the server. We just weren't understanding each other.

The secondary highlight of the day was our trip to the jade factory near our hotel. I used to have a silver ring that I bought in Mexico, but I was constantly losing it, and then one day I lost it for good. Loved that ring. Figured that now would be a good time to replace it, so we went looking for a new ring for the mama. I found a pretty silver ring with a ball of dark green on top. Also found a pair of beautiful silver and jade earrings, and, strangely enough, a pound of Guatemalan coffee to take back to M. (Yes, I bought jewelry for myself and coffee for M.)

Eventually, we ended up back at the hotel for the evening. Found a fun kid movie on Nick and settled in for the night. We were pretty much packed and ready for our 9:00 a.m. departure the next day. The big question at that point was: Would it be fireworks or a party keeping me awake tonight?

Fireworks. :)

Goin' to Guat -- Day 2

Friday, January 16, 2009

Day 2 in Antigua, Guatemala with J:

*Fantastic pancakes for breakfast!

*Headed out to explore. Note: Looking at a map, Antigua looks easy to figure out. Basic grid system of one-way streets. However, you soon learn how few streets are actually marked, so you have to learn landmarks instead.

*Found a bank and exchanged some money.

*Found an indoor market. Spent a lot of money on a lot of souvenirs. Had to carry a huge bag back to our hotel with a boy complaining that his feet hurt. Oh, and I had no idea where I was going. :)

*Rested a bit and then headed back out. Finally found Central Park -- easy to find, but we had originally headed in the wrong direction our first time out. Picked a restaurant for lunch where J chose to have a hamburger and fries. Unfortunately, his mama forgot to order it plain, so it came with ketchup and mayo on it. Yeah, that went over well. I couldn't believe we were sitting in GUATEMALA and he was refusing to eat. But eat he did.

*After lunch, got some frozen yogurt and went to hang out in Central Park. Great place to people watch, but also a place to get approached by those needing money. Pointed out the shoe shine boys to J -- shouldn't they be in school? We then had a woman and a baby want to sell us a necklace. Two school-aged girls who spoke English decided to tag on. They went away when two police officers showed up and just stood there. I bought a necklace from the woman -- having an adorable Guatemalan baby to feed was enough for me. It's a wonder I didn't just empty out my money bag. After she left, the police hung around for a bit, but as soon as they left here come the girls demanding that I buy from them. Honestly, they were mean, and I didn't care for their methods. I think it scared J. I ended up giving them a few dollars but not taking a necklace. Totally wrong way of doing things. After that we walked back to our hotel, and I took that moment to explain it all to J -- why those girls had to do what they were doing.

*Back at the hotel, I was smart: Took the time to go through souvenirs and recall prices for that trip back through Customs. We rested a bit, and then eventually headed out for dinner. Being a bit later and not really wanting to be out much after dark, we just went around the corner to the pizza and pasta place. How exotic, huh?

*The evening was topped off by two events. First, we got a knock on our door and told that our "friends" were out front waiting for us. Friends? Yeah, Juan Carlos. Um, no friends, sorry. Second, someone close by had a loud rockin' party including a trumpet. They danced the Macarena -- had to smile when I realized, hey, at least they probably know the words. So, not a lot of sleep that night.

And those were the highlights of day 2. Getting lost but finding our way. Using my Spanish somewhat successfully. Buying stuff. Interacting with those in need. Enjoying the beauty all around.

Day 3 right around the corner!
:)

Goin' to Guat -- Part 1

Well, we did it. Short version: We went, we saw, we loved it. Fabulous trip.
Now, for those of you who might like a little more detail, here's the long version:

First, a little background. Parents of foreign born children know that more than likely they will travel back to their child's birth country. The hard part is figuring out the best time to do that and how that might go. We had always heard that middle school age is the best time to attempt such a trip, so we had always assumed that this is when we would go to Guatemala with him. However, after bringing home the youngers from Ethiopia, the need for J to connect with his heritage became great. Waiting until middle school got thrown out the window, and instead we realized it was time to take him at the age of 9. So, the planning began.

Because of S and E, we decided that this would be a short trip for J and his mama. I started researching and planning back in the summer and had tickets booked by fall. We would fly into Guatemala City, have a driver pick us up, and spend our time in the colonial city of Antigua. On the one hand, it wouldn't give him a clear picture of where he came from, but on the other hand it would be safe and at least give him a taste of it all.

So, very early on Thursday, January 15, 2009, we set out for the airport. Our flight left Columbus a little after 7:00 a.m. after being thoroughly de-iced. We landed in Atlanta, and I had hoped for the chance to get something to eat and go to the bathroom. Nope. We were running to our next gate and managed to get there with just a few minutes to spare. Our 3.5 hour flight to Guatemala City was highlighted with an in-flight movie, and our choice of a $7 sandwich or a $6 cheese plate. We stuck with our own snacks and free peanuts and cookies.

As we circled around GC preparing to land, we took in the scene out of our window. Incredibly beautiful mountains, volcanoes and lakes mixed with the not-so-beautiful cement and metal of the city. Looking closely, you could see the packed neighborhoods of little houses spreading out far and wide. As we taxied to our gate, I had to smile a bit at the sight of airport workers in short-sleeved shirts and not bundled up like those in Columbus. Good sign! We made our way off the plane, through immigration, and found our one checked bag. As we stood outside the airport waiting for our driver to bring his van around, I noticed something unusual for me. As we stood near a family of Guatemalans, my 5 feet 4.5 inches seemed quite tall. J was almost as tall as the adult men. Finally, our driver came around with his van and loaded us in. Off we went.

As we drove away from the airport, I found myself comparing Guatemala with Ethiopia. I was surprised at how nice everything seemed to be: Nicely paved streets with lines and traffic lights! New cars! Beautiful palm trees! Not as much smog and pollution! We laughed at seeing the American favorites -- Burger King, Taco Bell, Pizza Hut and, unfortunately, a Hooters. Gas appeared to be about $3.00 a gallon at the Shell station. Once I got used to seeing the typical sights, I started looking past them. This is when I started really seeing things as they actually are. No, I probably wouldn't want to walk most of these streets on my own. The poverty became more apparent as you looked down the side streets and looked more closely at the store fronts and the people out and about. We drove on, and I soon realized that we were driving through Mixco. J's birth place. We didn't see much of it, but we saw enough for me to imagine what life would be like for his mother. You know, they say that poverty alone is not sufficient reason for adoption, and I agree. But I also know that women in this country and in others often have many compelling reasons for giving up their babes. So, while I had a moment of wondering if J really needed to be taken from his home country, I also reminded myself that I had not walked in his mother's shoes and should not judge or feel guilty. I continued watching the sights as the van rolled on out of the city and toward Antigua. J fell asleep.

The drive to Antigua is beautiful. A well-paved road winds its way through some gorgeous country -- green, hilly, beautiful. Lots of stuff being sold off the road. Need some furniture? Paintings? Other decor? It took maybe 45 minutes to get to our destination. It became obvious that we were there when we saw the cobblestones and the old buildings. Our driver took us right to our hotel: Casa Concepcion. They call it a boutique hotel, but we would call it a bed and breakfast. Behind a high wall and thick wooden door, we were led to a beautiful house with lovely grounds. There were four regular rooms, each with its own bathroom, and there apparently is also an apartment available. We had a living room (with access to a laptop with internet!) that we could use, a dining room for our breakfast, and a patio for lounging. All I can say is that it was all simply beautiful. Decorated in a traditional fashion, everything seemed to be of high quality and done with style. Somebody hired a great decorator! J kept saying that he wanted to take it all back with us.

After winding down a bit, we decided to head out for some food -- we were both starving. We walked around the corner from the hotel and found a pizza and pasta place. So, our first night in Guatemala we had pepperoni pizza and 7-Up. Yeah, not the traditional black beans and tortillas, but I was ok with that. Soon we headed back to crash in our room. Great idea, but I soon learned not to expect quiet evenings -- noisy birds, sounds of cars on the cobblestones, and booming fireworks made sleeping a challenge.

Here's some pics of Casa Concepcion:



And that was day 1. Day 2 to be blogged when I have the chance.
:)

just need to say...

1. If you don't have any kids, don't give me parenting advice. You have no clue. Seriously.

2. If you do have kids, but your kids have never experienced the loss and abandonment of my kids, then think twice before giving me parenting advice. You might think it is all the same for all kids, but you would be wrong.

3. If you do have kids, and they have experienced loss and abandonment, then by all means offer it up!

Just sayin' . . .